Please Don’t Say You Love Me

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

I’m scared. I’ve never said those words before to someone like you. I’ve never had those word to said to me from someone like you either.

Sure, I’ve said I’ve loved people before but it’s not like this. I didn’t say those three words while staring into someone’s eyes while our fingers are intertwined. I haven’t said those words so slow and deliberate that the receiver feels every ounce of love in the depths of their soul. I have left trails of my kisses along their jawline while whispering those words in between every time my lips collided with their skin.

And I don’t want to do it with you either. Not yet. Not because I don’t want too because I really, really want too. But don’t say love because we’re not yet ready. We’re not ready for the weight of what those words carry but it doesn’t make this any less real.

I told myself the next time I say those words I would mean it forever and never go back on it. I told myself if I feel those words start to fall out again I would make sure that this would be the right time. And even though I know it is, it’s scary when you know. Fear will always be something that holds people back.

With love sometimes comes pain, and I’ve been in pain so many times before with the misuse of ‘I love you.’ I’ve told myself past situations were love. I really believed it too. Then those…